What was I thinking? – Black band T-shirts

5 Nov

NO

Looking good champ, I hear the ‘breadstick half-dipped in marmite’ look is in, and has been for the several years you’ve worn little else.

What’s that you say? Conversation piece? You live in Swindon, you jackass. Most people here think a Biffy Clyro is some kind of special bong. You’re considerably more likely to be scorned for liking a band that sounds like Queen if Freddie Mercury was a cat on heat than you are to strike up conversation with a friendly stranger over similar music tastes. Face it, the only discourse you got out of those things was a “When did you see Wolfmother, James?” out of your Economics lecturer. An economist? Knowing who the hell Wolfmother are? Don’t make me laugh.

But hey, at least you don’t waste all your money on posh high street brands. Sorry? £18 a shirt? Hahaha. You’re a dick. That must be some kind of posh thread in the stitching, ‘cos judging by the way the colours have faded and the print has worn off after five washes it sure ain’t premium cotton.

Oh sure, it’s a mememto of a good gig. It’s got the date on the back and everything. But then why the hell did you buy that poster/lithograph/sticker set? Stickers?! Old enough to drink, drive, get married, rent pornography, and get into that bar/club place that a friend of a friend had a decent party at but you’re not really fussed about going again, not old enough to stop playing with stickers. Hit Steve up, I hear he’s got a spare Frank Lampard he wants to trade. Jesus.

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One Response to “What was I thinking? – Black band T-shirts”

  1. Abs November 9, 2009 at 7:15 pm #

    So… what are you going to wear now then?

    P.S. At least they give you some broadness of chest!

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